Mangina – Derisive term for a man’s feminine side -   especially when he’s touchy or emotional about something seemingly minor.

As it is all too common knowledge, I have been having a rough couple of days. The day after my big fight with GwtS I was feeling better but definitely not fantastic.  I really felt like I still just wanted to sit down and talk to someone about what I was feeling.  I also really didn’t want to see anyone. (Ahhh the juxtaposition that is female anguish…)

Friday I made plans to have a friend date with the European.  He is a pre-med student I went out with twice right after I actually split up with GwtS in November.  He was to be my first attempt at implementing the five date rule.  He was also my first failure at implementing the five date rule.  I hadn’t seen him since December.  He texted me when I was dating PB and I told him I was dating someone.  He stopped texting but recently he was trying to make contact again.  We had made plans to go have dinner and drinks on Friday.

When he texted me Wednesday to confirm Friday I told him I was having a bad day and he asked if I need someone to talk to.  I agreed to let him come over. When he got there I told what was going on, focusing mostly on my man troubles.  He sat and listened to me offering little commentary.  He offered to go get some beer and we sat and talked and drank a little.

He managed to get me off the subject of GwtS.  He scooted closer and though I was really not interested in any sort of physical action we started kissing.  I am really not interested in him but it was a distraction and I needed it.  I didn’t really want to talk to him and since we were making out I didn’t have to.  After a while we moved to the bedroom and one thing led to another.

I have never been less interested in sex in my life and found myself completely disgusted with him the entire time.  I literally gagged at one point.  It wasn’t really him.  I just didn’t want him like that and I knew it wasn’t going to make me feel any better.  Still I chose to have sex with him.  He tried to hold me after and I suggested we go out and watch a movie instead.  We sat on the couch and finished another beer.  He tried again to just sit and hold me but I scooted further away from him.  I couldn’t have been less attracted to him if I had tried.  He asked if I was hungry and offered to run across the street to get food.

I knew the moment he suggested making a food run he wasn’t coming back to my house and I was so relieved.   He collected his things and told me he’d be right back.  After about three minutes I got a text message.  He asked if I was in love with GwtS.  I asked him why that mattered to him.  He noted it was all I talked about.  I laughed out loud and reminded him that he had come over so I could vent.  I didn’t ask him to, he offered.  He sent a text saying that he felt used.  I really didn’t care.  He hadn’t been honest about his motive for coming.  If it didn’t work out the way he wanted that was his issue. As far as I was concerned he got exactly what he came for.  He told me he was going home and I told him I knew that he would before he left.

I really couldn’t stand the thought of sitting there with him.  Not only had he been insincere about his motive for coming but he was also behaving like an insecure child after he achieved what he came to achieve.  That is so unattractive to me.  This inability to rationalize his own actions is so beyond unattractive.

He was grasping at straws in an attempt to make me feel guilty because I wasn’t falling all over myself to be with him.  His dishonest attempt to “be there for me” hadn’t worked out the way he hoped so he was trying to play the victim.  What he was doing was predatory at best but it turned out he was too sensitive.  He just tried to take advantage of the wrong girl at the wrong time.

If I weren’t so amused by his reaction I would probably be upset with myself.  It is nice to be the one teaching the lesson for a change.  If I were interested in vagina I would date a girl.