Random Bits of (Very Unnecessary) Information
One day, while at work, I was sitting at my desk checking in books when a man about my age came in with his three year old son. He spoke to me for several minutes. He asked a little about how I came to live in this small community, how I enjoyed it and what I did for fun. They were general feeler questions that I didn’t mind answering because I like feeling like men are interested in me. I sometimes fear I may just be slipping into the dating abyss and become completely invisible to men. It seems dumb but I feel sorta’ shut off when it comes to men. I am still not my witty, charming, dynamic self.
He sat down in the children’s section with his son and I could hear him reading to the boy. I have always appreciated, as a single parent, the effort put forward by other single parents to engage their children. I spent many a long day, in the library with my son, reading and talking about books. It is nice to see parents doing productive things with their children. I always felt it was important.
After a while, he made his way back to my desk. He explained that he had custody of his son and that he only planned on being in the area for a short period of time. I really wasn’t interested in him but I didn’t mind chatting. His son called him back over to the books. He had selected another book to read. His dad ushered him toward to table that sat adjacent to my desk. As he was reading to his son, they got to a line in the book. “The dinosaur brushed his teeth.” He then added, “That is something daddy always forgets to do.”
Sometimes the things people say astonish me. Why would you spend twenty minutes chatting a girl up then make a comment about your poor personal hygiene in front of her? That is just gross. I spent the duration of his stay in the library marveling at his lack of common sense. When they settled on some books they stepped over to my desk. As I checked them out he smiled at me and said he hoped that he would see me again soon. I gave him a quick smile and they left. “I hope not,” I mumbled as they exited.
It seems this would go without saying but here goes… If you are trying to get a feel for someone you think might be interested in you don’t say things, in their presence that’ll totally gross them out. Don’t offer information they don’t need. It is gross that you don’t brush your teeth but to announce it is just stupid.
I have a blogger friend who asked why the girl he was dating needed at least an hour to get ready for anal sex. I was dumbfounded. I wasn’t confused that she might need some prep time. I can think of several reasons that might be. I was appalled that she told a guy she was casually dating she needed prep time. I don’t understand why she thought it needed to be said at all. Why does your date need to know you need to “prep” for sex. If you’ve discussed sleeping together then all your partner needs to know is that you consent to said sex. He doesn’t need to know you have to give yourself an enema (For Fuck’s Sake!) or that you need time to get things loosened up. (WTF!)
When it comes to dating, less information really is the best policy. If you have a communicable disease you should be honest… You should just be honest but don’t tell people things that will gross them out. You shouldn’t tell people things that aren’t necessary or that will make them wonder what you are up to. Keep things simple and fun.
Posted by trjensen on January 14, 2013
- My favorite color is purple.
- My second favorite color green.
- I look horrible in purple and green.
- I am brutally honest.
- I am often accused of being a know-it-all.
- I am funny.
- When I started noticing my weight loss, I took at least 100 pictures of myself a day.
- I can always point the problem in the predicament I find myself in. I know exactly how to remedy them but seldom do.
- I have liked more guys whose name starts with “J” than another letter in the alphabet.
- Younger men always seem to be attracted to me.
- I have been out with more men this year than in the first seven years I dated.
- I hate cotton, especially cotton balls. The way it feels makes me clench my teeth.
- I love cinnamon flavored anything.
- I was pregnant in high school.
- “Wind Beneath My Wings” makes me cry every time I hear it.
- I can tell with in the first two minutes of meeting a man whether or not I would ever sleep with him.
- I don’t trust the number 23.
- I have a totally twisted, politically incorrect sense of humor.
- I tried to rewrite the bible in the second grade.
- I have won three national awards for television production.
- I love to write. It is definitely my favorite thing to do. (Almost )
- Getting food poisoning in 2009 was probably the best thing that ever happened to me.
- I am a closet cougar.
- I want a boob job.
- I love looking at myself in the mirror.
- I don’t spend much time at home.
- I am very clumsy.
- I have had two surgeries on my left knee just because I tripped and fell down.
- Autumn is my favorite season.
- I go shopping when I am depressed.
- I want to write a book, then write the screenplay, then direct the movie.
- I would love to live in Sydney for a year.
- I would love to win the lottery but I never buy tickets.
- I love having bad dreams.
- I want to own my own production company.
- My son is named after one of my brothers.
- Sometimes I think I will be single forever.
- I still think about my mom every day.
- I always ask myself how I am doing and answer out loud.
- I have full blown conversations with myself in public.
- I love gangster rap.
- I have an entirely different life in my mind.
- I always go shopping on Black Friday.
- I love Disney World. If I could go every year for the rest of my life I would.
- My son has the quickest sense of humor of any person I know. I love it.
- I attribute everything I have accomplished as an adult to three people.
- I seldom eat meat but bacon is my vice.
- I have naturally curly hair.
- I had seizures until I was six.
- I really want a boyfriend
- I am definitely a cat person.
- I hum and sing Christmas carols when I am in a good mood.
- I love to take baths.
- I want Anthony Bourdain’s job.
- My friends are my family.
- I have been to Disney World three times.
- I am totally OCD.
- I get paid to watch porn.
- I don’t know what I would do without my cellphone.
- I take at least two showers a day.
- I love to cook but never do it.
- I don’t read nearly as much as I would like to.
- I normally get pretty mean when I drink whiskey.
- I like beer more than wine.
- I hate having roommates.
- I find it difficult to write while listening to music.
- I almost never apologize.
- I didn’t really like cartoons as a kid.
- I love sarcasm.
- I am pretty self-obsessed.
- I love spending money on other people.
- I am learning to be patient.
- I love video games.
- I dislike habitual liars.
- I never eat leftovers.
- I would love to live on the east coast for a few years.
- I am perverted.
- I am the loudest person you’ll probably ever meet.
- I always put my movies in alphabetical order.
- I expect people to do what they say they will.
- I believe that everything happens for a reason.
- Punctuality is very important to me.
- I swear a lot.
- I am addicted to Facebook.
- I remember sequences of numbers that aren’t relevant at all.
- It takes me about three hours to fully wake up.
- I hate when people talk to me while I am waking up.
- The first thing I do when I wake up is smoke.
- If I throw up I want be taken to the emergency room immediately. I am a huge baby about vomiting.
- I love going to the movies but listening to people chew in the theater drives me crazy.
- I am on the computer pretty much 24/7.
- I seldom go to bed before 2:00 a.m.
- I could eat Mexican food every day for the rest of my life.
- I am happiest when I am making other people laugh.
- I love to swim but only in pools.
- I rather be too cold than too hot.
- I try really hard not to be cynical.
- I only like dating one man at a time otherwise things get messy.
- It annoys me when people don’t respond to texts.
- I am very fond of myself.
Posted by trjensen on November 23, 2011