…with Anal Sex

I have been writing a lot about my personal life lately.  I don’t mind doing do it occasionally.  I always try to tie my personal experiences into everything that I write but I don’t examine my emotional state all that often.  I just try not to focus on the bad parts of my life because the truth is I always get by and I don’t like talking about something until I find the lesson in it.

This morning I was going through my comments.  I had a suggestion on a recent post in which I asked for topics. It was four simple words, “only write about sex.” Although I deleted the comment and I never only write about sex, the reason I get so much traffic is because I do write about intimacy a lot.  I decided to indulge the request.  The request made me smile and I have been promising a certain someone I would talk about something that related to our sex life for a while.

I had never had anal sex until about a year ago.  It wasn’t that I was unwilling to try it; I just didn’t trust anyone enough to do it.  As I have discussed openly in the past, before I met GwtS last fall I was in FWB situation with a guy I have known for a while.  At some point we got on the subject of anal and I told him I had wanted to try it.  We decided to try it together.  He had had anal sex before and had some ideas about how to make it less uncomfortable for me.  Most importantly I trusted him. (He was also not very big which for the first time was a plus in my book.)

We had anal sex a handful of times and I neither disliked nor loved it.  It was simply something different and different could be good sometimes.  A few months later I started dating a guy I did like and trusted.  He asked me if we could have anal sex.  I was a little leery because he was pretty well endowed.  His dick is as big around as my wrist.  My wrists aren’t huge but I most certainly wouldn’t be trying to ram one up my ass.

To say that it was a completely different experience would be an understatement.  It was painful.  It hurt like hell.  Nothing says romance like a little rectal tearing.  I was also afraid of the long term damage that might be inflicted based on his girth alone.  I often joke that he ruined anal sex for me (not that there was much to be ruined.)  For a long time I refused to do it.  I know he wanted to but I really didn’t enjoy it.

Like anything else you share with a partner, communication is key.  We actually talked about what was bothering me about the experience.  I needed him to go slower and be less forceful.  Finally we got to a place where I could even relax enough to have an orgasm while we had anal sex.  I am certainly not going to have it on a regular basis but I have decided I don’t hate it.  But if I start shitting my pants when I sneeze someone is going to die.