I have been thinking a lot about what this leg of my journey is trying to teach me. I know what I want and what it seems like I am lacking. I want love, not platonic love but someone who loves me because they want to. I want someone to love me the way I have feel love for others. I grew up without a real sense of what unconditional love meant but was bestowed a gift in return. I learned to love unconditionally. I try to love everyone with an open heart and without stipulation. I have always been good at just loving people.
Sometimes I think I fill my heart up with so much love that I don’t really make room to feel the love of others. Other times I just think that I can’t feel it because it really isn’t there and maybe that is what I need to learn, maybe I just need to work on loving others. Maybe I am still learning that my love for me is really enough. Maybe I need to understand that putting love out into the world is just as important as having someone love you.
Everything terrible is something that needs our love. – Rainer Maria Rilke