My impending displacement is really starting to scare me.  Not only am I still very short on my rent.  I have also not secured a place for my son and I to go.  At this point I am feeling a little panicked. I don’t have a place to stay.  I mean I don’t even have any options.  I will lose everything I have.
I am still waiting to here back about the job I have interviewing for and I am hoping that will be determined very soon.  Part of the reason that job was appealing to me was because it is so close to where I live.  This may not be the case at the end of the month.  I have never not been able to keep my son ans I safe.
I feel like I am failing for the first time in my life.   I have a week today to come up with something, anything.  I feel a little broken.  It is making it hard for me to function and problem solve.  I have been trying to manage my stress but as you can imagine it is getting more difficult to do.
Right now I am just trying to figure out what I can do. The truth is I have had way rougher times.  I grew up under the thumb of an emotionally and physically violent man.  I had no sense of who I was, no self esteem and no self value.  It took me nearly thirty years to find out who I was and hopw to treat myself.  My parents divorced when I was thirteen. My mother was diagnosed with a disease that would kill her seven short years later.  I was my family’s bread winner and sole financial contributor at fourteen.  The one thing I always was was resourceful and resilient.
I have slept in my car, not had a place to stay but those are things I swore I would never let happen to my son.  It is hurting me.  He is just waiting for me to work out because I always do.  I really don’t think I can do it alone this time.  He seems unconcerned at it angers me.   I am so angry at me.