For the bulk of my twenties I didn’t date. I was raising my son and didn’t want to complicate a difficult and stressful situation by dating. I was also not very confident about myself. Actually it is probably a fairer statement to say I wasn’t very conscious of myself. When my son turned eighteen that all changed. I focused more on me. I worked on the things I didn’t like. I became comfortable in my own skin and I gained what some might call an overabundance of confidence. People started to identify me as an ego maniac and although most were doing so lovingly, there was some validity to that assessment.
I am awesome. I am attractive. I think people who I spend time with are lucky to have me in their life. I date hot men, some much younger than I am and I have a hard time not showing off pictures to anyone who will look. I also have no problem admitting any of this publicly. I am who I am; take it or leave it.
Although my unashamed pronouncement of love for myself certainly bothers some people the most obvious reaction is the desired one. I get a lot of attention. I get a lot of attention because I am confident and confidence is something people are drawn to. I make no apologies for who I am. I am the first person to admit I am not perfect. I am quick to make a joke at my own expense and share a story if I do something embarrassing/ stupid /crazy.
Even with all my flaws and the continued process of growing and learning I am always right where I need to be. I don’t have regrets. I don’t view any decisions as mistakes. Everything I experience is simply an opportunity to grow and learn. I never feel less amazing even when I stumble. I think everything I do makes me more amazing.
I love myself. People love me because I love myself. I won’t ever change that. People aren’t really wrong when they say I am narcissistic. I am okay with that because if I don’t love me no one else is going to either.
Ashmita
/ April 15, 2012my favorite line from this post has to be this : I am who I am; take it or leave it.
awsm post! you made my day! rather i would say night! will have a nice and full of self esteem’d sleep!
trjensen
/ April 15, 2012As you should!
Ashmita
/ April 16, 2012Style Meets Comfort
/ April 15, 2012This sums up your whole blog! Loving yourself makes you free to love others which is what I think life is all about. We love you too!
trjensen
/ April 15, 2012It does sum up my blog. I think I might just make this my about me. What do you think?
silly_G
/ April 15, 2012I love that line too. My equivalent is like it or lump it. Confident women are such a beautiful thing, aren’t they!
trjensen
/ April 15, 2012It totally is. I think the reason some women get attacked for it and others are praised for it is because of how the present themselves. Just because you know how amazing you are doesn’t mean you have to be a douchebag. There is a thin line between confident and cocky. Confidence = Every flattering adjective known to man. Cocky = Douchebag
silly_G
/ April 15, 2012Agreed! But I also think there is still alot of gender stuff that gets in the way before someone can determine if it’s confidence or cocky
..and honestly, I love a touch of cockiness in others!
theforgottenwife
/ April 15, 2012I’m a lot like you. Took me a long time to be comfortable in my own skin. I wouldn’t call myself a narcisist, but I’m borderline! Confidence is attractive. Truth! Don’t change. We love you the way you are!
trjensen
/ April 15, 2012Thanks! I don’t plan on changing.
Theo Black
/ April 15, 2012“I am awesome. I am attractive. I think people who I spend time with are lucky to have me in their life.” Congratulations, seriously. Once you’ve figured that out, lots of things get much easier.
airsquadron
/ April 15, 2012keep being you.., im with you for that, stay awesome
Jen and Tonic
/ April 15, 2012I think the people who are put off by your display of self-worth are intimidated. I struggle with self-esteem issues, but instead of looking down on those who have it, I look to them to see how I can repeat that success for myself.
Some people just like to sip on that Haterade
benzeknees
/ April 16, 2012Bravo!
Cakes McCain
/ April 16, 2012Exactly, take it or leave it.
I admire this about you Teri. You’re my f’cking hero.
Pink Ninjabi
/ April 16, 2012LOVE this post! It’s funny, when men do this, we believe it is deserved. When women do it, it’s called narcissism. Huh. Love how you view lessons as opportunities to grow, rather than a chance to regret.
Besides, we teach people how to treat us. It’s high time that women teach others that we are to be valued, loved, and respected. You go girl! Confidence is the most attractive quality about someone for sure. Better than any make-up, botox, or skin cream. Me rootin’ you on!
Pink.
A Dog With Fleas
/ April 16, 2012Great blog post!!! And I totally agree. You need to love yourself first before others will love you. People need to realize that!
And if they don’t, that is their problem!
Glad I’m just starting to realize that about myself too.
Thanks for reaffirming that it’s okay to like yourself and feel good about yourself.
karmicdiva
/ April 16, 2012One of my favorite sayings is I love who I am and your approval is not needed. great post.