Here’s a funny story.  Instead of getting rid of the kitty I have (and yes I have seriously considered giving her away) in an attempt to cat the odds of me becoming a cat lady, I have actually acquired another cat.  Where oh where did I get my new kitty you may be asking yourself.  The story is pretty fucking funny.

A few weeks ago the guy I used to date, who I love but doesn’t want a relationship with me, moved into a new apartment with a new roommate who is allergic to cats.  He has had his kitty, Whiskers, for a very long time.  His cat has a great disposition and we got to know each other over the three months the “Guy with the Smile” and I dated.  When he learned his new roomie couldn’t live with his kitty GwtS asked me if I would take him.  Me being the sucker that I am, and not wanting him to just give his kitty away to some stranger, agreed to adopt his beloved thirteen year old cat.

I actually like Whiskers and my cat doesn’t really have an issue with him being here but after a lot of thought I realized that my ex may be contributing to my inevitable future as some sort of cat hoarder.  In fact, it is as though he is encouraging me to embrace that outcome.  I am one step closer to my cat lady fate.  I didn’t realize it at the time.  When he asked I just figured that if I had his kitty he could still see his cat from time to time and that his cat would have a loving home.

Now I have kinda’ convinced myself that GwtS is just trying to get me to accept my fate.  I love the cat.  I am keeping the cat but I resent GwtS for giving me the cat. (Totally rational, I know!)  I have been duped, bamboozled, hoodwinked.  I may not get you but I’ll always have your cat.  ROFL!

Maybe I should just have every man I date buy me a cat.  It can be my consolation prize for failed relationships.  At least the cats will have sentimental value.

I was going to live a life where my major relationship was with a bottle of wine and I’d finally die fat and alone and be found three weeks later, half-eaten by wild dogs cats.  - Bridget Jones The Narcissist