I love him. It doesn’t matter if anything comes of it either because I know I am not alone in that feeling. Of course I want us to be together and I know that we could make each other happy. Funny how I started the week writing about him and found myself snuggled up against him, in his arms and waking up next to him for four consecutive days. I missed him. How could I not? I had given another person a piece of my heart and I didn’t realize it was missing until he came back with it. I was whole again.
When I met him at the door Monday, I was hit with a wall of emotion that matched what I was experiencing in that very moment. I had been carrying a piece of him with me and hadn’t even known it. I was trembling and grabbed him and hugged him to steady myself. He just held me. We talked for hours. We sat together looking into each other’s eyes. I missed his smile. It is infectious. You see that huge smile and you can’t help but smile back at him.
He is resilient and stronger than even he realizes. I have sat and listened to him tell stories about his past and even though I have seen some dark times of my own, he seems almost un-phased by the things he has seen and experienced. He doesn’t carry scars the way so many people do… the way I do. He is free; it is what I love about him. It is what makes me want to protect him and tell him every day that he is one of the most amazing people I have ever and will ever know.
I don’t think I ever said I loved him out loud until earlier today although I knew I did. There is something freeing about saying it. I would do everything for this man because as I said before, I want him to be happy. I want him to be happy even if it means I might have to be sad. What I really want is for us to be happy together. I want achieve my dreams with him. I want him to achieve his and let me be a part of celebrating those successes.
I want him to have everything he wants. I really hope that includes me.
Cakes McCain
/ March 17, 2012awesome
mysterycoach
/ March 17, 2012So they broke up? I missed the story some how I think…
trjensen
/ March 17, 2012They broke up while I was dating PB.
mysterycoach
/ March 17, 2012Oooh
this is nice (well, you know what I mean) Good for you!
totsymae1011
/ March 17, 2012I’ll cross my fingers for you.
nancyelizabethlauzon
/ March 17, 2012I teared up reading this. Have a shamrock for luck, and Happy St. Patrick’s day!
dribblingpensioner
/ March 17, 2012I do hope you achieve your dreams with your new friend.
adollyciousirony
/ March 17, 2012I’m so happy for you. Just give your love unconditionally and you’ll be fine girl
trjensen
/ March 20, 2012Thanks Dolly!
adollyciousirony
/ March 20, 2012You’re very welcome dear. I wish you all the best in Life and most especially in Love
More Than A Blonde
/ March 17, 2012As I read this I could feel the depths of everything you were experiencing. To be honest it was like I was reading my own words. (You even describe him a lot like I describe mine).
I’ve had to let mine go. And it makes me all that much happier that you have him back in your life.
Like you told me …protect you heart.
But love without hesitation. Good luck & enjoy it all.
trjensen
/ March 20, 2012I am very happy.
snarkysnatch
/ March 17, 2012“I had been carrying a piece of him with me and hadn’t even known it.” And with that I was brought to tears. One of your best pieces ever! You just took my heart by the hand.
trjensen
/ March 20, 2012I didn’t realize I wasn’t whole and he wasn’t either until we saw each other.
karmicdiva
/ March 17, 2012Bravo!
silentlyheardonce
/ March 17, 2012http://ahopefortoday.com/2012/01/14/hope-unites-globally-hug-award-guidelines/
Hi I nominated you for The hug award.
trjensen
/ March 20, 2012Thank you! This means a lot.
Jen and Tonic
/ March 17, 2012Guuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurl, you’ve got a MAJOR spring in your step. So happy for the both of you.
evilnymphstuff
/ March 19, 2012This post is so cute and beautiful! But I do agree with you! After all, maybe when he’s happy, you’ll feel this happiness too!
trjensen
/ March 20, 2012I think we are both feeling the same things.
xoxo bb
/ March 19, 2012Yeah! This is awesome news…at first I was confused but then got that it wasn’t PB and was happy for you. Yeeeee
Viciously Sweet
/ March 21, 2012I have been a little behind in reading… But OMG! I am so happy that March has come and washed away that February ick. This post made me so giggly and so happy for your happiness, I wish you all sorts of everything good!