Managing to Manage My Weight

When I decided I needed to settle down a little bit and just date one guy I gained weight.  I gained more weight than I wanted to gain.  I gained weight that I had managed to keep off for two years.  It wasn’t that I didn’t care about my body or the way I looked. I didn’t get lazy.  I was still exercising (and getting plenty of cardio. :P )  Still I managed to gain almost twenty pounds over a period of three months while I dated the same guy.  I am getting the weight back off.  So why do women really gain weight when in a relationship?  The most common theory is that women stop trying so hard once they feel like they are in a relationship, that they get lazy.  I lost weight and look the way I look for me, not for anyone else and I want to feel good about myself so I would never stop taking care of myself.  I do think other things can cause women to gain weight is a relationship.

Differences in Diet

As a woman who is primarily vegetarian (I occasionally eat seafood,) it can be difficult to date an omnivore especially when said omnivore only eats vegetables if they are fried.  When your diet in no way resembles  that of the man you are dating you find yourself adapting so as not have to prepare two separate meals.  Attempts to squeeze your healthier dietary choices into the joint menu are frowned upon and next thing you know you are eating lots of stuff you wouldn’t eat at home.  Fried everything is not an effective way to manage your weight.

Socializing

When women start dating a new guy there is a period of excessive socializing.  You want to show each other off, meet each other’s friends and just go out and have fun.  Typically these meet and greets happen at bars or parties.  Alcohol can be a huge factor to think about when you are watching your weight.  I often find that I might have a drink or two to relax when meeting new people.

The Comfortable Phase

Once you’ve met everyone and really start to spend some good quality time alone together, you find yourself sitting on a couch talking or cuddled up watching movies and just enjoying each other’s company.  You spend more time lying in bed in the morning.  You aren’t so eager to go out.  You become more content just spending time lounging.  This can lead to a decrease in opportunities to exercise (besides the aforementioned cardio.)

Stress

Relationships can be a source of stress even without external problems.  You worry about things like how much time you spend together.  Relationships change as everything falls into place.  The way you regard each other changes and sometimes it can cause you to worry about how everything feels.  As you get more serious, discussions of huge life changes like living together and children can add to that stress.  Many women gain weight when under a significant amount of pressure.

The potential to gain weight is just higher when you are in a relationship.  There are things that can cause you to lose control of your weight even when nothings changes about the way you manage your health.  You are still doing your best to stay healthy.  You just have to consider what else is going on in your life and still try to maintain a sense of your physical health.  You have to be flexible and adjust as is necessary.

I know many of these things had a lot to do with my weight gain and I know that I only have myself to blame.  I know how to take care of myself and what I need to do to stay healthy.  I didn’t get lazy but I also didn’t consider how spending time with someone could affect my overall health.  It is a lot easier to gain weight than to lose it.  It just comes down to the age old lesson.  You have to take care of you first.

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5 Comments

  1. Wow great post… I settled down (somewhat) with the Trucker for almost 3 months and lost all my progress too. Stress I think. And also three weeks holidays where I pretty much sat and cocktailed on my patio. Makes me mad. So much that I actually went to the gym twice this week for a steamroom. Next week maybe I will work out :)

    Reply
    • I kept telling the guy I was seeing, “You are making me fat.” The truth is I gained weight because I wasn’t prepared to gain weight. Now I know and it won’t happen again.

      Reply
  2. Oh my god…. Now I totally understand my 10lb weight gain since dating this new guy. Whenever he’s not around I seem to lose it, then he comes home (soldier) and its back again in no time.

    Reply
  3. This is good reading, thank you! I needed that reminder of what not to do, lol :)

    Reply
  4. Timely post! I gained about 10 pounds, too, since living with my guy. I think it’s because when he eats I feel compelled to join him even when I’m not hungry. When I’m alone, food is far from my mind. He’s always thinking about “What’s for [add whatever meal]?” He cooks and doesn’t mind eating alone, but I feel the internal need to please. Drats! I’m 54 and losing weight isn’t so easy when you get older…

    Reply

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